Several years ago, I began taking long, early-morning walks around Redlands, and that was the first time I encountered a lilac tree growing in the city. It was such an unexpected blessing, and I felt such an up-welling of joy at the sight, that I voiced a spontaneous prayer of thanksgiving to the Lord because in that moment, the lilac tree was the embodiment of His merciful kindness—He has given good, beautiful gifts to all mankind. Ever since that day, when I come upon a lilac, the Lord and I have a moment of communication. Not many people plant lilacs in Southern California, so I don’t come across them very often, but in the past three years, the Lord has led me to them once each year, and each time He has had something different to tell me. Believe it or not, it has never been the same lilac tree—I rarely remember where they are when I find them!
Three years ago, I was walking in a neighborhood near the Redlands Bowl when I looked up to see the lilac. I caught my breath in happy surprise, whispered, “Thank you, Lord—It’s beautiful!” And He said to me, “Denise, I know how you love lilacs, and I want to bless you.” That moment has never left me. The Creator of the universe knows my favorite flower, and what’s more, He gave me one!
The following year, His lilac message to me was a precious demonstration of His tenderness. I had been trudging through a very long, difficult season of several years, and really felt that I was almost out of strength. I was holding onto the Lord with everything in me, refusing to let go, but so heartbroken and weary. During that season, every now and then, I would offer up a feeble prayer, “Please, Lord, I know you are there, I know you haven’t left me, but I need to see you, just for a moment, could you show me that you are with me in this?” In the midst of that time, I drove up to Forest Falls to run an errand. It hadn't even occurred to me that it was lilac season, but as I turned onto the road leading back to the small town, I saw a flash of purple embedded in deep green leaves, “Was that a lilac?!” I couldn't see it because I had driven past it so quickly, and I felt a moment of loss—had I missed my lilac for the year? I kept driving, rounded a bend, and nestled back in a shady corner I saw another bush completely covered in lilac blooms. I was overwhelmed, praising the Lord, and pulled over so I could breathe in the scent. I must confess, I even pulled off one of the stems so I could take the beauty with me. I got back in the car, kept driving down the road, looked to the left, and there, across the street was another lilac. I looked forward, and saw again, another; my eyes darted all around, to the right, to the left, in every yard it seemed, all along the road, purple and white lilacs were bursting forth in full bloom. I had never seen anything like it. They were at their peak…vibrant with color, robust, sweet. With each glance, I heard the Lord say to me, “I love you…I love you…I love you.” And I wept. I couldn't help it. In the darkest cave, He is there. He knows. He loves.
Last year, in the spring, I was beginning to see an end to that long, dark season. There was a stirring that I could feel in my spirit. I didn't know exactly what was occurring, I just knew the Lord was leading my family to something new. There was hope in my heart, but also a lot of uncertainty because my husband and I were making some huge decisions about the direction of our family, and I confess I was afraid. I knew that after coming through one difficult season, I didn't have anything left to enter right into another one. So I was in constant prayer, pleading with the Lord for direction. I can’t even say it was a prayer of faith—it was a prayer of fear and desperation, of “What if we decide wrong?” I was walking one morning, and praying that prayer, when I suddenly came upon a small lilac bush. It wasn't particularly beautiful or healthy looking, but there was one lone cluster of flowers, holding onto the branch for dear life, and I was thankful to see it. “Thank you, Lord, I love you too!” I kept walking, meandering, praying, turning right, left….this is why I can never find the lilacs again…when suddenly in the yard to my right, was another lilac bush. This one was larger, healthier, and had quite a few blooms.I was stunned—never before had I come across more than one lilac in one day in the middle of the city, and this day I had found two! What abundance! “Thank you, thank you, Lord!” I kept walking, with no plan or direction, but I eventually came to an intersection where I felt an inexplicable tugging in my spirit to turn right. I hadn't experienced that before, but I figured I ought to follow the direction, just in case it was the Lord. I turned right, walked a ways down the street and there in front of me was a lilac tree. Not a little bush. Not a shrub. A huge tree, absolutely full of lilacs. It was stunningly beautiful. I stopped. “OK, Lord, you’re trying to tell me something pretty significant. I’m listening.” And this is what He said. “Stop worrying about where you are going. I will direct you. You will hear me, follow my voice, and I will cause you to flourish like this beautiful tree. You will no longer be a weary bloom barely hanging on to the vine. You and your family will flourish and bear much fruit. Trust me. I will lead you.” My spirit rejoiced! I had a promise from the Lord, and I grabbed hold of it with both hands.
In the year since that promise, the Lord has led us. He has clearly closed some doors, opened
others, and is teaching us to hear His voice.
We are still in the process of making some decisions and still seeking a
great deal of wisdom, but those decisions that have already been made have
begun a new season of growth in my family.
I am watching as my children take hold of the things of the Lord, as my
husband is filled anew with love for the Lord and His Torah. For my part, I am seeing the Lord answer very
specific prayers I had brought before Him over the years on behalf of my
family. And I feel joy. It is almost uncontainable, for I have seen
the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. I am not blind to the suffering of this world,
or to those around me. I am not blind to
the difficulties I myself continue to face, but none of that is enough to
overcome the joy that is in the Lord. He
is good. He does good. He loves His children with an unbridled love
that we cannot possibly comprehend.
At our Sarah’s Tent meetings we will be talking about
developing intimacy with the Lord—we have to have that before we can experience
true intimacy with each other, even in our sisterhood. The first step to intimacy with the Lord is
to believe at the core of your being that He wants to know and be known by
you. The second step is to pay
attention. He is talking to you. He is doing all sorts of things to get your
attention, to bless you, to speak with you.
If you aren't already, begin to look for them. Ask Him to open your eyes to the way He
communicates with you. Your spirit will
only be satisfied by intimacy with Him, so press in, and be ready. He’ll meet you in ways that astonish you, that
make you laugh out loud, that cause you to weep, that inspire spontaneous
praise. When He does, write to us to let
us know. Start a conversation on the
website—you will encourage and edify us all!
Lilac season is almost upon us again. I can smell the orange blossoms in the air,
so I know it is close! Even though I
know it is too early for blooms, I am expectant. I took a walk this morning, craning my neck
around every neighborhood I passed. I
haven’t seen any lilacs yet, but already the Lord is speaking to me about them
and beginning to teach me a new lesson.
Perhaps someday I’ll be able to share this year’s lilac message with
you.
Shalom!
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